I had my Cinco de Mayo Party. It turned out really well. I still have a fridge full of Coronas. There were several people who told me they would be there that didn't show up, but the people who were there was enough for me. Like 6 people came, and that turned out to be the perfect number. We got drunk and whacked pinatas and played name that tune. I never saw the guy I like to invite him, but that's okay, his loss.

I'm applying for a reality TV show again. I would pick me. I'm quality entertainment. If the people who chose these things don't see that, though, it's their loss, and I can continue being quality entertainment for the people I love, just not all of America.

"It's always funny until someone gets hurt. Then it's just hilarious." - Bill Hicks